Planning
For A Funeral
Here you will find some of the questions that your pastors
will likely be asking as plans are made for a funeral or a memorial service.
This booklet does not have very much
information about mortuary or cemetery services.
MORTUARY SERVICES
In Camarillo there are three mortuaries who can assist
families in time of need:
Conejo Mountain Memorial Park
2052 Howard Road
Camarillo, CA 93012
Phone: 805-482-1959
Email: wecare@conejomountain.com
Web: www.conejomountain.com/contact-us/
Griffin Family Funeral Chapels
1075 E. Daily Drive
Camarillo, CA 93010
Phone: 805-482-1166
Email: info@griffinfamilyfuneral.com
Web:
www.griffinfamilyfuneral.com
Perez Family Funeral Home
1347 Del Norte Road
Camarillo, CA 93010
Phone: 805-983-3457
Email: PerezFamily1913@me.com
Web: www.memorialsolutions.com/sitemaker/sites/rosepe0/
CEMETERY
The only cemetery in Camarillo is located at Conejo Mountain
Memorial Park (see above). But even if
you make plans for burial at Conejo Mountain Memorial Park, any mortuary can
assist with the other arrangements you may need to make.
Your pastors can also assist you if you prefer to make
arrangements with other service providers (Neptune Society, etc.).
A.
PRELIMINARY QUESTIONS
1. What is the name of
the person for whom we will be holding the service: __________.
2. Their date of
birth: __________.
3. Their date of
death: __________.
(More questions about the person’s life are asked below.)
4. Who is the person
making the arrangements who can be contacted if there are questions?
Name:
Relationship:
Phone:
E-mail:
5. What are your
wishes for the service location and the kinds of services and their order. There are many possible choices:
a. Location for the funeral or memorial service (Most people seem to expect that a funeral is a service where
the casket or urn is present; a memorial service is a service where there are
no remains present. The content of the
service, however, is essentially the same):
Church,
cemetery or mortuary chapel,
cemetery graveside,
other location.
b. Kinds of services
and their order:
Funeral in the church (or chapel) with the casket; burial
following in the cemetery.
Graveside burial service at the cemetery; memorial service
following in the church (or chapel).
Memorial service in the church (or chapel) with the placement
of cremated remains to follow in the cemetery.
Placement of cremated remains in the cemetery followed by a
memorial service in the church (or chapel).
6. In the case of a
cremation, will there be special arrangements for scattering of remains? Please be aware that state or local laws may restrict where cremated remains
may be scattered. See http://www.cfb.ca.gov/consumer/funeral.shtml#cremation
7.
Date of the funeral or memorial service: _________________
8.
Time of service __________
(NOTE: If the service is at Mount Cross, we try to
arrange for the service to be at 4:00 PM or later, Monday through Thursday, or
1:00 p.m. or later on Friday because of limited restrooms. State law prohibits adults from sharing the
bathrooms being used by our preschool children.)
9.
Will there be a reception? If
yes, where? If the reception will be at
the church, the pastor or someone from Helping
Hands will make contact to discuss the kind
of reception desired (meal, dessert, etc.)
B.
QUESTIONS ABOUT THE SERVICE AT THE CHURCH OR CHAPEL.
With your help the will put together
a meaningful funeral or memorial service, using the information you provide:
10.
The Book of Life (in other places this is called the eulogy). Will this be a part of the service? If yes,
who will be speaking. Do you wish to
have the pastor invite anyone present to speak?
11.
What passages from the Bible do you want to be read during the service:
12.
Are there special hymns that you would like to be sung?
13.
Would you like a special musical offering?
14.
We often prepare a worship folder for services in the church. The pastor will show you the choices we keep
in stock for you to choose from.
15. Will
pallbearers be needed for the service?
Names?
16.
Will a guest book be provided by the mortuary or cemetery?
C. QUESTIONS ABOUT THE PERSON
17.
Will there be an obituary appearing in the paper? Will it include a photo? If no, do you want a photo to be included in
the worship folder we prepare?
18.
Where were they born:
19.
Where did they die:
20.
Was the person baptized? In what
church tradition?
21.
Was the person married? The year?
22.
Was the person a veteran? Branch of service? Will there be military honors at the church
or cemetery?
23.
Who are the survivors to be named in the service?
24.
What was the person’s occupation?
25.
What were the person’s hobbies/other interests:
26.
Other personal information (special honors or accomplishments,
memberships in organizations, etc.).
D. COSTS
27.
There is no cost to use the church facilities and no fees are
charged by the pastors.
28.
If an organist plays for the service, the expected honorarium is
$125.00.
29.
If a soloist sings for the service, the honorarium should be in the
range of $50.00 for one song, $75.00 for two.
Be sure to honor additional work that may be required to prepare for the
service and extra work, for example, serving as own accompanist.
30.
If Helping Hands arranges a reception following the service,
the family is invited to make a donation to help cover costs. As a guide, if 100 people attend, consider a
donation of $100.00.
E. HELPING HANDS
31. Helping Hands is the Mount Cross service group that assists
the pastors and the church when funerals or memorial services are
scheduled. They primarily assist with
the reception at the church following the service. They will also assist by greeting those who
have come to the service and attending to some of the details inside the
sanctuary, such as the arrangement of flowers.
And if the reception is to take place at another location, they will
also assist as able and as needed.
F. FLOWERS
32.
When the service in the church will include the casket, it will be
covered with a large white cover (called the pall) which is emblazoned with a
cross. This white covering echoes the
white baptismal garment that may have been worn or given at baptism. It reminds us that we are wrapped up in the
righteousness of Christ and for that reason only are we fit for heaven. If flowers to cover the casket have been
purchased, they will be placed on a nearby table during the service in the
church. If an American flag is to drape
the casket, it will be removed when the casket enters the church and replaced
when the casket leaves the church.
33.
When flowers are delivered for a memorial service, the director from the
mortuary or a member of Helping Hands will arrange them so that they look nice and
do not block lines of sight in the sanctuary.
The family should look over the arrangement of the flowers and indicate
whether any should be moved to a more prominent location.
34.
If at all possible, please make arrangements to take the flowers to the
cemetery, to the reception or to the home or homes of family. We will not usually display the flowers from
a memorial service in the front of the sanctuary on a Sunday morning. The altar flowers for Sunday services are
usually smaller arrangements and it would not be appropriate to overpower them.
35.
If the flowers need to be left at the church, we will do our best to
break them down into smaller arrangements and distribute them to hospitals,
schools, nursing homes, etc., so they do not go to waste.
G.
MEMORIAL GIFTS
36.
When a church member dies, we usually send an announcement of their
passing, including date and time for the services. You may wish to have us include the request: “In lieu of flowers, memorial gifts may be
made to…” Please feel free to indicate your church or
community service agencies (hospice, for example) as recipient of these gifts.
37.
When memorial gifts are received by the church in the name of the one
who has died, one of the pastors or the memorials committee will discuss the
use of the funds with the family.
Possible uses for memorial funds include:
Gifts to the Mount Cross Endowment Fund. One of the nice things about these gifts is
that the principal is never used up; it joins with other gifts to generate
interest income that is used for special ministries and projects.
Gifts to purchase special needed items for the sanctuary or
the church.
Gifts to further certain ministries or activities (for
example, scholarships for camp or preschool).
H. AT THE CEMETERY
38.
Many times families want to remain at the gravesite or the place of
interment until the casket has been lowered into the ground and perhaps even
covered with earth, or until the urn is placed and its niche closed. In almost every case the directors at the
cemetery will accommodate your wishes.
39. Most families are probably unprepared,
however, for how these tasks are actually accomplished. In every case those who work to place
caskets or urns in
their final resting place will be khaki clad groundskeepers. When a grave is filled in after a service has
concluded, shovels
are not used; it is a
noisy backhoe that does the work. In the
case of the placement of a casket in a mausoleum or an urn in a niche, the
worker has to apply a
seal from a caulking gun. In short, the
work that has to be done may not be as spiritual or reverent as one might have
hoped. For some this industrial and very down-to-earth
activity is helpful for closure, but that may not be true for all.
Please call or email the church office or one of the pastors
if you have any questions.
- - - - -
Mount Cross Lutheran Church
Pastor
John W. Soyster — pastorjohn@mountcross.com
Pastor
Erik Goehner — erik@mountcross.com
102
Camino Esplendido
Camarillo,
California 93010-1717
Phone:
805-482-3847
Email:
office@mountcross.com
Web:
www.mountcross.com